I allowed myself leave
Felt pushed out
But still grasped at the dream

One that would be beneficial for more than just us
maybe, perhaps, someday, one that’ll lead Them to not cuss

Now I’m rediscovering my old friend
She silently screams internally at me
Dry-heaving as she drowns in fucked up dreams
Unsure of what she sees, hears, or feels.

Distrust and hurt, once decades old
Memories, choices long ago burnt
Dredged up so easily
Pushed onto me.

This weight is mine to shoulder with my saddened friend
I only hope that God gives me a full life to make amends.

If only forgiveness was easily won
and my wandering friend could work with me,
to make our soul content
our purpose known
tasks done

and a happy home.